Changed

I think it’s time
For better or worse
To accept something
In my life

The elusive muse
I poured my soul and
Heart into
may never truly return

Is it the price of gratitude
and praise that makes
the strongman weak
by default?

Whispered words
Words shouted from
mountain tops
Sexual desires revealed
And expressively explored
I was always More
than honest in my intent
Nd’ I wonder if I was but
A fool

Is silence golden
Desire sheathed
Better kept at arms length
Better served with just promise

I would have set the world on fire
I would have created kingdoms
In the clouds in the sky
I could have easily spilled blood
For your honour
I have created constellations amongst the stars in your name
We were the King and Queen of
Babylon
Did I kill our eternal bond?

Is it fair to say
From my heart
That I love you
Is it fair to say
That I accept All
Of you and more
Is it fair to say
You are still perfect
In my eyes
Is it fair to say
That I would set myself
Ablaze
Than rather not have you
In my current life

It’s not a void
That you filled
Not a need I
Was lacking
Not someone
That I searched for
Or someone
To replace
You were not
The answer to
A drug I desired
We were bonded beyond
My gift to you
Is RESPECT and
SPACE

“I’m not a prophet or a stone aged man, just a mortal with the potential of a Superman”
D.Bowie

You…  fulfilled me
You were the manifestation
of my true potential
You completed me to be
The Superman

You showed me that I was strong
You believed in me and more
You saw me as something else
I was Magick, wisdom, sexy

For the first time in my life
I had allowed myself to own these
Humble actions, scared of ego
The misrepresentation of what
Was actually self-esteem
Not the Jock. Not the Bully.
Not the Face of Partiarchal Abuse.

I am and always will be
Who I am by default
Naive is the benefit of the doubt
I trust and care by default
And wear my heart upon a sleave
I find truth and success in
Helping others selflessly
I wear more scars from knives in
my back, stabbed by thousands before you

My mind and heart should be
Hollow and numb, but giving is the air that feeds my life.

I will not allow myself to change
I wear this new pain as an albatross around my neck like a crusifix
I find myself waiting and hoping
That this is indeed meant
To be

Forever and always
My muse my queen
My partner that’s never
Been

I guess
In my awkward humble way
I must admit to Both of us
That I love you… .

MB93
2022